Tuesday, November 6, 2007

Shhhh

"..it's ok if it's not a white Christmas... we can sleigh ride on the sand...we'll bundle up in sweatshirts and sweaters... just don't you let go of my hand"
~feelingleftout~

If only life were as easy/simple/innocent as song lyrics make it seem.

Silence speaks volumes. Yes, I folded and I told.
Silence can do serious damage to your ear drums.
Maybe it's because in those moments of awkward silence.. you have no choice but to hear what is going on inside your own head. Helpless and in the zone, you are forced to pay attention to your thoughts whether you like it or not. Don't get me wrong, I'm all about reflection and down time but... sometimes silence is murder. At some point you have to reach within yourself and break the cycle.

I'm doing all I can to take my own advice. I'm doing all I can to be better than someone who doesn't care. I do care. A lot. I'm not afraid and yet I am terrified of breaking down my walls. My walls are built pretty high and through the years.. I become more against letting people inside the fort. It hurts to open up when you have no idea if that door will be shut in your face.

I've done the cookie cutter sweetness but sometimes the recipe calls for a lil salt and spice. Why do I word things like that? lol What I mean is.. I dance around issues in a happy-go-lucky light more than hitting such issues directly because usually that calls for serious tone and nobody wants that. Forgive me. I can't seem to shake the silence.

<3

2 comments:

Coach B. said...

I've done the cookie cutter sweetness....and I give up! I added a lot of sugar and spice and I couldn't be happier! You go girl

blustar said...

Thanks, I'm def trying... =)