Eye of the fish.

Over the last 2 weeks.. one fact is clear.
M. Phelps has become a man crush for boys across the globe and a hero to dedicated girls everywhere.

He currently holds the title of: The Best Olympian of All Time.
Congrats to you sir. Your fish-like abilities were not stressed in vain.
Your 40 hours + of swimming paid off in the ultimate way. 8 Gold Medals.
It's inspiring to see hard work pay off. Good job you.

And for another opinion:

Flashbacking

For today's musical flashback...
I'd like to tickle your ear and eyes with some cheesy but classical music videos. If only music of today could be as inventive and hauntingly catchy.

Two songs were triggered into my brain today. Thus, the first thing I did when I got off of work was to look them up and sing along accordingly. Don't lie. You would've done the same thing.

Let George and Paul sooth your overworked soul.

And. Here. We. Go -




And last but not least -

Don't get mad at me but...

Typically when someone starts a phrase this way... you will.. in fact.. end up getting mad. Even if the angst comes from a comical place in your heart - your first reaction will usually be.. "WHAT?!" or something of that nature.

At night, I sit on the computer and I look/apply for jobs. I haven't had any luck these last few weeks though other than countless spam that consumes my e-mail. Nevertheless, I am still on the search for something else. My job isn't terrible, I'm doing good things for children.. but.. at the same time.. I'm getting burnt out really fast at the expense of slowly being taken advantage of as an employee. I'm standing up for myself sure.. but that isn't going to change the system. I must just defend my status until I can comfortably leave.

Tonight I found out that my co-worker, the only other full-time girl - my friend - turned in her resignation letter. *insert the "WHAT?!" here. She has not been able to find a new job yet but she just can't handle the environment at hand any longer. She is married and is going to bank on his earnings for a while as she hopes to find something new.

I'm proud of her. This is something that she has been thinking about before I even started working there. While I'm proud, I also just hope she does find something soon. I think she can work for her Dad or something as a last resort - still - any resort is better than none.

That leaves me. As if stress wasn't already piling on top of my plate at work - if I'm the only full-time person there - I can't imagine the load that is about to be dropped upon me. Thus, I might have to swallow hard and exhale until I lock onto a new job. I fear my days without her being there to withhold sanity. Even so, the search continues. I'll hear back from something soon - and if not - I just have to try harder. Right?

Curse the liberal arts.

Unwrapped 411.

I am a turtle.
I am standing on my shell.

We are all faced with conflicting situations where we are left with two choices.
We can either hide away in our shells..do nothing.. sit back.. act lazy..
or we can bust out of our shells and leave our comfortable existence behind.. in hopes of gaining something more rewarding.

I am naked.
I am exposed.

It's not comfortable standing outside of your zone. You spend your entire life creating this "believed existence" henceforth, feeling naked or exposed is completely natural. In order to grow as individuals, we must venture out into the cruel dark world.. leaving our beds, our habits, and our shackles in the distance.

I am ready.

Back in high school.. I traveled to a run down area of Mexico to help build houses for people. Arguably one of the best experiences of my life thus far. I went on this trip - being the youngest person involved and also not knowing anyone. I just.. wanted to do it. I heard about it on a Thursday. Got shots on Friday. Went on a 3 day bus ride that Sunday.

I couldn't shower for a week and the food we ate was worst at best. Was it hard? Yes. Was the sun torturing hot? Yes. Was The smell of the town was absolutely horrid? Yes. With every inhalation, the smell would curdle in your nose and cause nausea to creep into the form of a concern.

It was great.
I got over myself.
I got over thinking that I needed things for every day life. Sure, certain things make life easier.. but most things aren't needed. Going from sometihng to nothing really opens up your eyes to what is around you. You really never do realize what you have until it's gone. Unfortunate for us. Life is short.

When we stay isolated in our shells, we tend to take advantage of things, people, life. My best advice - do not be this way. Step outside, let people in and don't be afraid to be who you are. Love yourself and you can in turn, love others. Do what you think is best for you, what is right - even if that means stepping out on a limb. Just do it. Be confident.

I attempt to live with the mindset of "making the best of whats around." I grew up beating nightmares with that mindset and I don't regret that. I have always been seen as a confusing half split of a pessimistic attitude and innocent optimistic energy.. but that's ok. It's me.

I'm at another point where I'm trying with every waking breath to remind myself of what is important in life. Stresses try to block perceptions and that in itself is lame. Why would anyone strong willed let those things factor into a lifestyle? I don't want to be that way, matter of fact.. I refuse to be.

In order to not let the little things tear away at your soul, you have to step outside of yourself sometimes. Sometimes you have to stand up when everyone sits down. You have to speak when you know nobody wants to hear what you have to say. What does it matter to you? What should it matter to you?

And when we accomplish these goals of beating the lazy gene, we can tuck back in our turtle shells and take comfort. We rest in knowing we lived another day not taking anything for granted. We rest at night, cuddle close, hold dear to the ones you love - and know that the next day - you can step outside.... and home will be waiting for you.

A penny for your thoughts...

... but I'd rather have a dollar.