".. and a little baby talk to make sure you still work, it's business.."
As perusual, I instantly became attracted to the notion of being involved on a movie set. I know which cards to use when I'm dealt certain hands.. and in this case.. I just happened to know which names/networks to drop. It's awesome to have simialr interests with friends 'in the business' because they keep you updated without hesitation.
I auditioned for a character role -and- for a moment in time.. I actually had the part! Granted, it was a small (but camera friendly) role - but a role none the less. The electricy that ran through my brain was almost as explosive as it was when I found out that I no longer had the part. What? Oh yes. I lived my dream for about a day and a half before the crushing realization of the cliched "that's showbiz" phrase haunted my damp eyes. Turns out *in an ironic twist of fate* that I was too tall for the role. Me?! This may be the only time ever in life I will be told I'm too tall for something. It's kinda funny now.. but then.. I wasn't too amused.
Everyone on the set ended up knowing me for "being the girl who got cut. the orignal mini-me. the girl who got her hair cut for nothing" - with a grain of comical salt, I took it. Hey, at least my legacey lived on for trival/lame/boring gossip. I heard that the celebs felt bad for me and yet weren't shocked that David O. Russell changed his mind. The director is about as fickle as a flip-flop but - it's in his hands, he should do what he wants to make the picture work.
Things do happen for a reason though. The movie is a chaotic showcase of miscommunication and dramatics. The time/money/life wasted during this project proves to me that I'm way better off for not being commited. I still worked it out that me and a few friends could do some extra work on the movie. I'm better off for not having my own trailer or imbd credit. I landed a real job (practical and constant) and it pays the bills. Not only that.. but I've been able to have a life.
When the next movie rolls around.. am I going to try to be involved? Well, I'm already working on that. Yes, I'm in the works of setting dates aside to be a zombie. So while I'm trying to be responsilbe with my job - at least - in fleet moments - I can still get a touch of hollywood to feed my desire to be in front of the bright lights.
<3
Sunday, June 1, 2008
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
February
"You and I, cold February night.. it's been a half an hour.. taking sweet time saying our goodbyes... one minute more. The best day of my life is all thanks to you. Precious remembrance saved for rainy days or February. Few scenes from my life or moments mean more to me than our fine nights" - TheStartingLine
Question: Was February was a good month for me?
Answer: Understatement of the year.
Step One: Wake up with your mind pre-programmed in a ‘rinse, lather, repeat’ fashion.
Step Two: Panic when out of nowhere someone cuts the water off, leaving you a soapy (but fragrant) mess.
Step Three: Realize you don’t care that your eyes sting from the Herbal Essence that clogs your tear ducts.
Step Four: Realize you don’t care that you didn’t finish your habitual routine.
Step Five: Wipe the soap from your eyes as you stand cold, naked and curious.
Realizing someone has the potential to change your life forever is a cold, cleansing, and curious shower.
met·a·phor - an implicit comparison, something used, or regarded as being used, to represent something else; emblem; symbol. a figure of speech in which an expression is used to refer to something that it does not literally denote in order to suggest a similarity .
I don’t keep receipts. I keep everything else under the sky… but I never keep restaurant receipts. There is simply no point for me to recap those transactions to anyone. (Shout out to online banking) However, if you look inside my hungry wallet, you will find one IHOP receipt from February 23rd at 5:20am.
The 5:20am IHOP adventure was not a breakfast meal, it was a… been out all night and in need of food type of meal. Also known as.. I’m not quite ready for this night to end so lets go somewhere for a bit longer.
I will do my best to control my syrup tendency - but the bottom line is – I finally found someone worth my time.
That is a big deal.
Seriously, that is huge.
See, a distant friend re-entered my life and the possibility of getting to know him better excited me. I’ve always though t he was cute but without question, there was an underlying chemistry between us. We instantly connected on several levels and I admit, it took me by surprise. You just don’t come across something like that everyday. Yet while easy to recognize, it can also shock you at the same time. For me, it was a good shock. Truly. Like a bolt of electricity pumping through my veins making my heart beat faster.. sending endorphins through my body with every awakening pulse.
We actually hung out and talked for a few hours about life and love. He told me about his thoughts and I told him my philosophy of how you have to have faith that someone is out there.. waiting/looking for you just as you were waiting/looking too. I told him my dating profile and shared my faith and trust based on knowing that God would pull through in the end with someone worth my time and affections. I’ve always refused to settle or play the random hook up game. I think that is sleazy and it creates unhealthy baggage and false expectations that nobody needs. It’s better to wait – wait for what is wroth your energy and precious time.
Wait for what you know in your heart and mind is right. When you find something great, hold onto it dearly. Don’t take it for granted because in a fleeting moment of desperation, the thing you crave so deeply – could be gone forever.
So anyway, we discussed things and had great conversations on our nights of hanging out. (Which became quite frequent)
Again, huge deal to me. While I’m known for pointless quotations and random outbursts, I thrive off of meaningful conversations. The things he said about what he wanted in life were pretty much the exact same thoughts I had. So much so, that I was taken off guard. That ‘shock’ and ‘to good to be true’ mindset took me by surprise. It actually took me a few days to wrap my mind around the reality of how hard I was crushing on him as I wondered how much he was crushing on me. I was initially hesitant but I quickly realized I had been praying for that shock “ moment” for.. well.. forever. I didn’t mind that I had soap in my eyes or that I was exposing myself to someone, as if naked in the shower of my mind. I didn’t mind a break in my lonely routine. Instead, I welcomed the break with curiosity and baited breath.
Step Six: As the water comes back on, finish your shower but with a new perspective and outlook what this refreshing sensation means.
Longer story short – we started dating and it’s been great. I’m not going to cheapen our relationship by shedding details of us, because that’s not my style, but just trust that when I say things are great – I mean that. I’m not using a cliché of everything looks perfect from far away bit – I truly am happy and in love. I’ve never felt so comfortable with anyone so fast and I’ve never felt anything of such certainty before. That’s a good thing. Huge.
God is the ultimate completing force but he allowed for our paths to cross in such a way that I feel whole. As if this was the plan from the beginning. While I’m not one to typically rush into thoughts beyond my grasp, we’ve got a good thing going and I can’t wait for all of the adventures to come.
-kp-
Question: Was February was a good month for me?
Answer: Understatement of the year.
Step One: Wake up with your mind pre-programmed in a ‘rinse, lather, repeat’ fashion.
Step Two: Panic when out of nowhere someone cuts the water off, leaving you a soapy (but fragrant) mess.
Step Three: Realize you don’t care that your eyes sting from the Herbal Essence that clogs your tear ducts.
Step Four: Realize you don’t care that you didn’t finish your habitual routine.
Step Five: Wipe the soap from your eyes as you stand cold, naked and curious.
Realizing someone has the potential to change your life forever is a cold, cleansing, and curious shower.
met·a·phor - an implicit comparison, something used, or regarded as being used, to represent something else; emblem; symbol. a figure of speech in which an expression is used to refer to something that it does not literally denote in order to suggest a similarity .
I don’t keep receipts. I keep everything else under the sky… but I never keep restaurant receipts. There is simply no point for me to recap those transactions to anyone. (Shout out to online banking) However, if you look inside my hungry wallet, you will find one IHOP receipt from February 23rd at 5:20am.
The 5:20am IHOP adventure was not a breakfast meal, it was a… been out all night and in need of food type of meal. Also known as.. I’m not quite ready for this night to end so lets go somewhere for a bit longer.
I will do my best to control my syrup tendency - but the bottom line is – I finally found someone worth my time.
That is a big deal.
Seriously, that is huge.
See, a distant friend re-entered my life and the possibility of getting to know him better excited me. I’ve always though t he was cute but without question, there was an underlying chemistry between us. We instantly connected on several levels and I admit, it took me by surprise. You just don’t come across something like that everyday. Yet while easy to recognize, it can also shock you at the same time. For me, it was a good shock. Truly. Like a bolt of electricity pumping through my veins making my heart beat faster.. sending endorphins through my body with every awakening pulse.
We actually hung out and talked for a few hours about life and love. He told me about his thoughts and I told him my philosophy of how you have to have faith that someone is out there.. waiting/looking for you just as you were waiting/looking too. I told him my dating profile and shared my faith and trust based on knowing that God would pull through in the end with someone worth my time and affections. I’ve always refused to settle or play the random hook up game. I think that is sleazy and it creates unhealthy baggage and false expectations that nobody needs. It’s better to wait – wait for what is wroth your energy and precious time.
Wait for what you know in your heart and mind is right. When you find something great, hold onto it dearly. Don’t take it for granted because in a fleeting moment of desperation, the thing you crave so deeply – could be gone forever.
So anyway, we discussed things and had great conversations on our nights of hanging out. (Which became quite frequent)
Again, huge deal to me. While I’m known for pointless quotations and random outbursts, I thrive off of meaningful conversations. The things he said about what he wanted in life were pretty much the exact same thoughts I had. So much so, that I was taken off guard. That ‘shock’ and ‘to good to be true’ mindset took me by surprise. It actually took me a few days to wrap my mind around the reality of how hard I was crushing on him as I wondered how much he was crushing on me. I was initially hesitant but I quickly realized I had been praying for that shock “ moment” for.. well.. forever. I didn’t mind that I had soap in my eyes or that I was exposing myself to someone, as if naked in the shower of my mind. I didn’t mind a break in my lonely routine. Instead, I welcomed the break with curiosity and baited breath.
Step Six: As the water comes back on, finish your shower but with a new perspective and outlook what this refreshing sensation means.
Longer story short – we started dating and it’s been great. I’m not going to cheapen our relationship by shedding details of us, because that’s not my style, but just trust that when I say things are great – I mean that. I’m not using a cliché of everything looks perfect from far away bit – I truly am happy and in love. I’ve never felt so comfortable with anyone so fast and I’ve never felt anything of such certainty before. That’s a good thing. Huge.
God is the ultimate completing force but he allowed for our paths to cross in such a way that I feel whole. As if this was the plan from the beginning. While I’m not one to typically rush into thoughts beyond my grasp, we’ve got a good thing going and I can’t wait for all of the adventures to come.
-kp-
Wednesday, April 9, 2008
i'll be back
I am very aware of my MIA status as of late.
Deepest apologies - it'll never happen again.
Well, unless I get super busy... because then... it will most certainly happen again. Forgive me, Im honest.
I won't make broken promises because that isn't my style... but I will promise to catch you up on my thoughts and experiences.
Ex. I wrote this a few weeks back but it never got posted for some reason. IDK either.
I exist more comfortably in my environment now than I did a year ago at this time.
At this time last year…. I spent restless days and nights on a cold hospital floor pondering faith, love and if people really do have a purpose to the ‘so-called’ grander plan. Questions flooded my brain until my thoughts pulled me under a tidal wave of hypothetical notions. The nights I tricked myself to sleep… I would wake feeling as though I was washed up a distant shore. If I achieved rest, I felt it meant pleasure for the body and thusly, I felt guilty for allowing myself a healthy outcome when internally I felt so useless.
I had just come back from what should have proven to be the ‘best spring break of my ever' *insert trl style screams here* Well, I wish I could say that I enjoyed my all expense payed vacation to Cancun, Mexico. I wish I could tell you that I loved every minute of that all inclusive resort I called home for a few days. I wish I could tell you… well.. I wish I could tell you fun stories. Not the going to bed at 9pm or the sea sick day. Sure, I have a few things (refer back to me throwing up for an hour or so) but the majority of my time was spent starring into the crystal water with the warm sun beating down upon my troubled mind. The soft sand beneath my feet... unknowingly.. comforting my spring desires as I remained peaceful. In this moment, I realized what I wanted to do – go home - and break out of the mold that was forced upon my soul.
Was I homesick?
Negative. I don’t get homesick. I love to travel and experience new places in full.
Then what the heck was my problem?
How do you want to leave paradise?
A lesson that we all learn at some point in our lives. I already learned this – tis why I didn’t want to go on this trip in the first place but… if your heart is somewhere else – so are you.
My heart was breaking for my family and I was expected to go to another country and act like everything was peachy. That is the most fake thing I can possibly imagine and it irritates me /still\ that everyone made it out to seem like not a big deal.
To receive a collect call saying that Delaney stopped breathing and this may be her last night – while I’m off in another country with MTV on Spring Break? You’ve got to be kidding me. There is more to life people. More to life.
I hope you realize that the charade can only last as far as you are willing to manage and compromise yourself. You can only bend so far until you break. Don't EVER be afraid to stand up for yourself and break free from the shackles that bolt you into low expectations and tired dreams.
Deepest apologies - it'll never happen again.
Well, unless I get super busy... because then... it will most certainly happen again. Forgive me, Im honest.
I won't make broken promises because that isn't my style... but I will promise to catch you up on my thoughts and experiences.
Ex. I wrote this a few weeks back but it never got posted for some reason. IDK either.
I exist more comfortably in my environment now than I did a year ago at this time.
At this time last year…. I spent restless days and nights on a cold hospital floor pondering faith, love and if people really do have a purpose to the ‘so-called’ grander plan. Questions flooded my brain until my thoughts pulled me under a tidal wave of hypothetical notions. The nights I tricked myself to sleep… I would wake feeling as though I was washed up a distant shore. If I achieved rest, I felt it meant pleasure for the body and thusly, I felt guilty for allowing myself a healthy outcome when internally I felt so useless.
I had just come back from what should have proven to be the ‘best spring break of my ever' *insert trl style screams here* Well, I wish I could say that I enjoyed my all expense payed vacation to Cancun, Mexico. I wish I could tell you that I loved every minute of that all inclusive resort I called home for a few days. I wish I could tell you… well.. I wish I could tell you fun stories. Not the going to bed at 9pm or the sea sick day. Sure, I have a few things (refer back to me throwing up for an hour or so) but the majority of my time was spent starring into the crystal water with the warm sun beating down upon my troubled mind. The soft sand beneath my feet... unknowingly.. comforting my spring desires as I remained peaceful. In this moment, I realized what I wanted to do – go home - and break out of the mold that was forced upon my soul.
Was I homesick?
Negative. I don’t get homesick. I love to travel and experience new places in full.
Then what the heck was my problem?
How do you want to leave paradise?
A lesson that we all learn at some point in our lives. I already learned this – tis why I didn’t want to go on this trip in the first place but… if your heart is somewhere else – so are you.
My heart was breaking for my family and I was expected to go to another country and act like everything was peachy. That is the most fake thing I can possibly imagine and it irritates me /still\ that everyone made it out to seem like not a big deal.
To receive a collect call saying that Delaney stopped breathing and this may be her last night – while I’m off in another country with MTV on Spring Break? You’ve got to be kidding me. There is more to life people. More to life.
I hope you realize that the charade can only last as far as you are willing to manage and compromise yourself. You can only bend so far until you break. Don't EVER be afraid to stand up for yourself and break free from the shackles that bolt you into low expectations and tired dreams.
Monday, March 10, 2008
Miracles
My soul erupted in a blaze of fiery emotions.. pumping a train wreck of notions through my veins.
I remember as if it was yesterday when my world became unexpectedly and forcefully tilted on its axis.
Gravity pulled me downward into a spiral of doubts and frustrations. If not for amazing friends, I might have lost all control of my mind. I lost my appetite and my desire for sleep medications to help the insomnia. I went for 4 days at a time before allowing myself to actually sleep at night. Friends are blessings. Sometimes you need an outlet outside of family to keep you accountable and to ease your troubles.
How alarming and unsettling it is to know that life courses may be altered by a simple phone call. The power that one message can contain is sometimes beyond our comprehension.
On my way to stand in front of a room full of my collegiate peers to talk about sociological statistics in marriage,
I received a striking phone call from m y brother. He informed me that my niece was borderline breathing in the womb
And was on the brink of becoming a memory. 3 Months premature. The same age my nephew was when his life was tragically taken away from him. God rest his soul. Brady Thomas – you are forever in my heart and mind. I love you.
Well, his sister almost shared the same horrid fate… I was completely wrecked. Luckily, my group project partners understood the situation and another member of the group stepped up and spoke in front of the class. I owe her. The salt from my tears would have ruined the note cards, weeks of hard work.
Delaney, my niece, came into this world and was given the gift of life beyond the womb. She has been under countless surgeries – including around 4 brain surgeries. She has had part of her intestine removed and we are unsure of her current ability of sight. Well folks, after me spending about 3 months on the hospital floor, throwing up in the baby nicu, crying in the parking lot, praying in the waiting room, and smiling by the incubator… and feeling all around beautifully broken – she made it. She is a force with a will that surpasses most people I’ve had the fortune of coming in contact with.
Now, she still faces many issues but – the point is – she is alive. One year old – amazing.
This little girl broke my heart and repaired it all within a single moment in time. I don’t know what you believe in but – if you didn’t believe in a higher power or God – you would after being near her. God has this way of breaking people and using situations to show you things – to recognize his grace and glory. She is a miracle. She brought us all back to our faith in a hardcore manner. I respect that.
I am no longer afraid of hospitals. Previously, only negative energy haunted me as I crossed the threshold of a hospital. I watched my father die in a hospital. I watched a machine get unplugged from a wall – determining the outcome of my father’s life. I watched my mother fall into pieces and scream for answers. I’ve been to a dark place and I admit, I fall back into my pain at times --- but --- last year, something wonderful happened --- yes, in a hospital. Death versus Life. The ongoing battle of what we can not control. Let Go, Trust God.
Well, needless – Delaney is awesome and to her - I owe some strength and my leap back into a good place in my faith. I gave her humble dedication in my hospital visits and she showed me that – when you love someone – you get beyond your insecurities and you overcome them because the past does not define the present… your outlook/perceptions change as we look – not at our own hang-ups – but when we zoom in on supporting the ones we love.
I believe in miracles. Open your eyes and you will too.
<3
Thursday, February 28, 2008
I'm back, no really.
Yeah, I'm going to post later.
I need a nap right now but I'm back, on the real this time.
A lot has gone down since we last had this thought to keyboard experience.
<3
I need a nap right now but I'm back, on the real this time.
A lot has gone down since we last had this thought to keyboard experience.
<3
Friday, February 15, 2008
Valentine's Day
Well - we made it.
Yes, yet another Valentine's Day has come and gone. Gratz if you had someone special to share this commercialized day with: including but not limited to: hearts, candy, roses, and other expensive displays of emotion. Don't get me wrong, it's totally cool to participate in the happiness of this day - just - try to remember to keep that 'good feeling' going all year round.. love doesn't just get exciting for one day.. it should just serve as a cute/rad reminder of what you've got.
And for those of you that are a member of the S.A.D (single awareness day) club.. I hope you did something fun too. Love isn't just in the form of boyfriend/girlfriend - it's totally ok to express your love for your friends and family. I usually get cheesy cards (last year it was Hello Kitty) and give them to friends.. just because that's how I roll.. but this year, I was sick and kinda kept it low key. I didn't use my cell phone or the computer to message anyone. I really just took the day off for myself.
I spent the first part of the day with my family (mom rocks for taking care of me in my sick/pathetic state that I was in up until today)
Then I dressed up in some crazy outfit and hit up a pretty hilarious valentine's dinner with my best friend. We had a great time just hanging out and being ourselves. After that, some other friends of mine called me to come hang out at a place in town and I totally went. A band that I dig was playing and we all had a chill time.
So all in all, it was a pretty cool day.
Of course, in the back of my mind and in the most intimate places within my soul - I wish I did have 'that someone' to cuddle up with... but alas, I save my romantic love for another day. I'm interested in when the day will come that I can be in that place but I don't obsess over it because that's not my style. What is my style? Prayer over my life, future and feelings. I'm at a place where I'm ready for the next step. I had to work through some issues from previous baggage but - I'm proud to say that I'm at a good place and I have been for a while. Question remains.. who wants to take that next step with me?
<3
Yes, yet another Valentine's Day has come and gone. Gratz if you had someone special to share this commercialized day with: including but not limited to: hearts, candy, roses, and other expensive displays of emotion. Don't get me wrong, it's totally cool to participate in the happiness of this day - just - try to remember to keep that 'good feeling' going all year round.. love doesn't just get exciting for one day.. it should just serve as a cute/rad reminder of what you've got.
And for those of you that are a member of the S.A.D (single awareness day) club.. I hope you did something fun too. Love isn't just in the form of boyfriend/girlfriend - it's totally ok to express your love for your friends and family. I usually get cheesy cards (last year it was Hello Kitty) and give them to friends.. just because that's how I roll.. but this year, I was sick and kinda kept it low key. I didn't use my cell phone or the computer to message anyone. I really just took the day off for myself.
I spent the first part of the day with my family (mom rocks for taking care of me in my sick/pathetic state that I was in up until today)
Then I dressed up in some crazy outfit and hit up a pretty hilarious valentine's dinner with my best friend. We had a great time just hanging out and being ourselves. After that, some other friends of mine called me to come hang out at a place in town and I totally went. A band that I dig was playing and we all had a chill time.
So all in all, it was a pretty cool day.
Of course, in the back of my mind and in the most intimate places within my soul - I wish I did have 'that someone' to cuddle up with... but alas, I save my romantic love for another day. I'm interested in when the day will come that I can be in that place but I don't obsess over it because that's not my style. What is my style? Prayer over my life, future and feelings. I'm at a place where I'm ready for the next step. I had to work through some issues from previous baggage but - I'm proud to say that I'm at a good place and I have been for a while. Question remains.. who wants to take that next step with me?
<3
Sunday, February 10, 2008
Pack your bags Flu... we are done.
Ok, from my last posting.. you know I've been sick.
Well, I don't remember the last time I've felt so baldy.
I thought I just caught a mild cold.. but it suddenly turned into the full fledged flu with some bronchitis on the side.
I have a very low protein diet and in times of sickness, I am greatly reminded of this deficiency. Proteins help you fight germs/negative entities in your body and my lack of them leaves me sick for longer than I'd care for. It's because I don't eat much meat.. but I'm going to work on that. I took my supplements and vitamins but sometimes, it's not enough.
I drank buckets of water for two reasons:
1) I tend to get dehydrated a lot and with the constant fevers and sweating, water was a must.
2) It would make me, without much hesitation, get out of bed to go to the bathroom - flushing out my system and making me work my muscles. If not for going to the bathroom, I would not have gotten out of bed at all. I would make myself walk around for a few minutes, sit at my computer for a second.. read some news and checks some sites, change clothes - then get back in bed.
Do you know how many clothes I went through? Great Day.
I washed stuff yesterday - like 7 loads of clothes.
My fevers would get so bad that I'd sweat through my clothes (as if I just ran 6 miles) and immediately after, the chills would start. My skin would get so cold from the sweat, I'd have to change clothes. Gross. But.. I guess changing clothes was also good because.. who wants to be in germified clothes all day?
I would take showers.. but you'd never know it.
I'd brush my hair... but you'd never know it.
I was straight up, death bed looking sick.
I'm still going through cough attacks and blowing my nose.. but I'm up to feeling 85% better - and that's almost as good as 100% to me. I give myself til tomorrow til I'm about 90% and each day following will bring me closer to 100.
I honestly hope that everyone avoided this sickness that is going around the world. The Today Show wished people luck in avoiding this.. and in my bed.. coughing... sweating... freezing... I laughed.
If you are sick.. here are some tips:
1) if you can't swallow pills due to the horrible sore throat:
Liquid dayquil and liquid nyquil work wonders. Use the dosage cup and down that nasty mess every 6 hours.
2) Benadryl allergy is also great for this - and those pills are tiny/easy to take.
3) Drink water until you feel like you might burst.
4) Even though you aren't hungry - try to eat some soup/mashed potatoes/toast. Just something to have in your stomach. I had a stomach virus too - so I couldn't keep too much down without throwing it up - so just have small portions of things.. to help the medicine do it's job and to keep you from getting cramps of hunger as you lay in bed.
5) Sleep when possible. Even if it is the day time and you feel you should stay awake. Forget that junk. Get your hours right when you feel better. You can't do anything else anyway - so just - sleep. Or, at best, close your eyes and just lay there in quiet. You might not thing you are doing much for yourself, but in reality - you are.
6) Take Vitamins
7) Wash your hands when you can
8) Whenever you get out of bed, take that opportunity to clean the area of empty pill things/wash out your dosage cup, take your cups to the kitchen and get new ones to fill with water, close up bags of tissue and put a fresh bag next to your bed to refill... just keeping the germs to a minimum.
9) spray disinfectant around trashcans, bed, light switch and doorknobs when you can.
10) Remember... you will feel better... one day.
<3
Well, I don't remember the last time I've felt so baldy.
I thought I just caught a mild cold.. but it suddenly turned into the full fledged flu with some bronchitis on the side.
I have a very low protein diet and in times of sickness, I am greatly reminded of this deficiency. Proteins help you fight germs/negative entities in your body and my lack of them leaves me sick for longer than I'd care for. It's because I don't eat much meat.. but I'm going to work on that. I took my supplements and vitamins but sometimes, it's not enough.
I drank buckets of water for two reasons:
1) I tend to get dehydrated a lot and with the constant fevers and sweating, water was a must.
2) It would make me, without much hesitation, get out of bed to go to the bathroom - flushing out my system and making me work my muscles. If not for going to the bathroom, I would not have gotten out of bed at all. I would make myself walk around for a few minutes, sit at my computer for a second.. read some news and checks some sites, change clothes - then get back in bed.
Do you know how many clothes I went through? Great Day.
I washed stuff yesterday - like 7 loads of clothes.
My fevers would get so bad that I'd sweat through my clothes (as if I just ran 6 miles) and immediately after, the chills would start. My skin would get so cold from the sweat, I'd have to change clothes. Gross. But.. I guess changing clothes was also good because.. who wants to be in germified clothes all day?
I would take showers.. but you'd never know it.
I'd brush my hair... but you'd never know it.
I was straight up, death bed looking sick.
I'm still going through cough attacks and blowing my nose.. but I'm up to feeling 85% better - and that's almost as good as 100% to me. I give myself til tomorrow til I'm about 90% and each day following will bring me closer to 100.
I honestly hope that everyone avoided this sickness that is going around the world. The Today Show wished people luck in avoiding this.. and in my bed.. coughing... sweating... freezing... I laughed.
If you are sick.. here are some tips:
1) if you can't swallow pills due to the horrible sore throat:
Liquid dayquil and liquid nyquil work wonders. Use the dosage cup and down that nasty mess every 6 hours.
2) Benadryl allergy is also great for this - and those pills are tiny/easy to take.
3) Drink water until you feel like you might burst.
4) Even though you aren't hungry - try to eat some soup/mashed potatoes/toast. Just something to have in your stomach. I had a stomach virus too - so I couldn't keep too much down without throwing it up - so just have small portions of things.. to help the medicine do it's job and to keep you from getting cramps of hunger as you lay in bed.
5) Sleep when possible. Even if it is the day time and you feel you should stay awake. Forget that junk. Get your hours right when you feel better. You can't do anything else anyway - so just - sleep. Or, at best, close your eyes and just lay there in quiet. You might not thing you are doing much for yourself, but in reality - you are.
6) Take Vitamins
7) Wash your hands when you can
8) Whenever you get out of bed, take that opportunity to clean the area of empty pill things/wash out your dosage cup, take your cups to the kitchen and get new ones to fill with water, close up bags of tissue and put a fresh bag next to your bed to refill... just keeping the germs to a minimum.
9) spray disinfectant around trashcans, bed, light switch and doorknobs when you can.
10) Remember... you will feel better... one day.
<3
Saturday, February 2, 2008
Ouch
Hey,
Fevers are lame and sore throats are stupid.
Everyone I live with has had the flu recently.
I say recently.. but like.. within the last two weeks.
I've done all I can to avoid everyone in my house.
I woke up today feeling like a hot mess.
Let us hope it stops with the sore throat.
<3
Fevers are lame and sore throats are stupid.
Everyone I live with has had the flu recently.
I say recently.. but like.. within the last two weeks.
I've done all I can to avoid everyone in my house.
I woke up today feeling like a hot mess.
Let us hope it stops with the sore throat.
<3
Thursday, January 31, 2008
All We Are, We Are
Hey,
Last night was nothing short of amazing fun. To say that I needed the faces that I saw and then events that took place… is an understatement. Things at the house/work/etc. have been oddly stressful lately and I really needed a night – strictly for fun. I can always trust that when I'm with my friends – that 'everything is good in the world' feeling kicks back in.
Did I mention that the concert I went to rocked?! If you don't know Matt Nathanson, look him up. I can hook you up with a list of my favorite songs – just ask. I've got every album. I've been a fan for 5/6 years. He is uber talented, hilarious, and in his own quirky way – charming as all get out. He has a passionate spark when it comes to his music – you can't help but want to know more about him and his life. Thus, we go to his shows for a glimpse of it all.
I sang aloud to every song and went into my own little matt zone. I talked to him for a hot second after the show and def. said..
"you might not remember me but…" Then he goes, "OH YAH!" And gave me a big hug and said something about the shows I helped put on for him.. and the airport pick-up, haha. He signed something for me and he said, Kristie right. I said yeah – he goes, KR right. So basically.. that.was. rad.
We took a picture together and he pulled my face into his and goes, "your breath smells amazing"
HA – he cracks me up!!! Thanks Orbit for that brief moment in time, I owe you… haha!
Here is his new single: Car Crash
I also met Ingrid Michaelson. Her voice is just as unique as she seems to be. She has a haunting vocal range that will leave you with odd melodies stuck in your head for hours. I was impressed. I knew most of her songs but I'm not a massive fan like I am with Matt. I've kept up with the music scene enough to pick out her better songs and those are the ones I frequently play. She reminds me of my cousin which is a little bit crazy but – cool none the less.
A very chill, indie show well done.
The night seemed like it went by so fast. When all was said and done, it was a little hard to believe it was as late as it was. Time to hit the road. Me and my homegirl had a long drive back home… in the rain.. that never stopped… haha but it's all good. Worth every drop and I'm ok with making coffee to stay awake at work. =)
Later
Last night was nothing short of amazing fun. To say that I needed the faces that I saw and then events that took place… is an understatement. Things at the house/work/etc. have been oddly stressful lately and I really needed a night – strictly for fun. I can always trust that when I'm with my friends – that 'everything is good in the world' feeling kicks back in.
Did I mention that the concert I went to rocked?! If you don't know Matt Nathanson, look him up. I can hook you up with a list of my favorite songs – just ask. I've got every album. I've been a fan for 5/6 years. He is uber talented, hilarious, and in his own quirky way – charming as all get out. He has a passionate spark when it comes to his music – you can't help but want to know more about him and his life. Thus, we go to his shows for a glimpse of it all.
I sang aloud to every song and went into my own little matt zone. I talked to him for a hot second after the show and def. said..
"you might not remember me but…" Then he goes, "OH YAH!" And gave me a big hug and said something about the shows I helped put on for him.. and the airport pick-up, haha. He signed something for me and he said, Kristie right. I said yeah – he goes, KR right. So basically.. that.was. rad.
We took a picture together and he pulled my face into his and goes, "your breath smells amazing"
HA – he cracks me up!!! Thanks Orbit for that brief moment in time, I owe you… haha!
Here is his new single: Car Crash
I also met Ingrid Michaelson. Her voice is just as unique as she seems to be. She has a haunting vocal range that will leave you with odd melodies stuck in your head for hours. I was impressed. I knew most of her songs but I'm not a massive fan like I am with Matt. I've kept up with the music scene enough to pick out her better songs and those are the ones I frequently play. She reminds me of my cousin which is a little bit crazy but – cool none the less.
A very chill, indie show well done.
The night seemed like it went by so fast. When all was said and done, it was a little hard to believe it was as late as it was. Time to hit the road. Me and my homegirl had a long drive back home… in the rain.. that never stopped… haha but it's all good. Worth every drop and I'm ok with making coffee to stay awake at work. =)
Later
Sunday, January 27, 2008
what a week
Last week was pretty insane with the sheer volume of daily attempts to bring me down. I've defiantly never been put through such emotions as I have last week. When something is done, it's done. When the timer goes off - the popcorn is ready to be eaten. Setting it for another 4 minutes is only going to burn the bag and/or set it on fire. Funny how some people try to set you on fire. I guess it's fun to watch.
I'm not bitter, I just don't understand why some people say the things they say.. or behave the way they do. It's very interesting.
Point to this vague blog. I hope that I will be left alone of the drama I don't wish to partake in. I think I proved my point that I refuse to be a pawn or be made to feel insecure by anyone. Sad that it came to that though.
In other news, my weekend picked up my mood a bit bc I got to see 2 movies and got to see 2 friends. I finally caught up on the sleep I had missed from the weekly insanity. I've been limiting my computer time lately so that I concentrate on a few other things so forgive me for being slack on the blogs.
No frets, I'm back..
***congrats to The Office for getting the SAG Award for Best Ensemble!***
Well Earned! Can't wait for new episodes... the WGA ordeal left me with baited breath!
<3
I'm not bitter, I just don't understand why some people say the things they say.. or behave the way they do. It's very interesting.
Point to this vague blog. I hope that I will be left alone of the drama I don't wish to partake in. I think I proved my point that I refuse to be a pawn or be made to feel insecure by anyone. Sad that it came to that though.
In other news, my weekend picked up my mood a bit bc I got to see 2 movies and got to see 2 friends. I finally caught up on the sleep I had missed from the weekly insanity. I've been limiting my computer time lately so that I concentrate on a few other things so forgive me for being slack on the blogs.
No frets, I'm back..
***congrats to The Office for getting the SAG Award for Best Ensemble!***
Well Earned! Can't wait for new episodes... the WGA ordeal left me with baited breath!
<3
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
Kill the Messenger
"...I know I'll feel better in the morning
But this is how I feel right now...
If you need anything just call
The understatement of the year.."
-Most Accidents Occur 10 Miles From Your House-
-feelingleftout-
Ever feel alone in a crowded room?
Do you think to yourself.... is life going to be like this... forever?
Can the cycle be broken as quickly as a wave that hits you out of nowhere?
We wait...
with our anxious breath and tired hopes...
but even still....
we wait.
I
wait.
I invite such distractions into my scene and i am ready to discover what it all means. let us make our moves and embrace those moments...
...before they pass us by...
But this is how I feel right now...
If you need anything just call
The understatement of the year.."
-Most Accidents Occur 10 Miles From Your House-
-feelingleftout-
Ever feel alone in a crowded room?
Do you think to yourself.... is life going to be like this... forever?
Can the cycle be broken as quickly as a wave that hits you out of nowhere?
We wait...
with our anxious breath and tired hopes...
but even still....
we wait.
I
wait.
I invite such distractions into my scene and i am ready to discover what it all means. let us make our moves and embrace those moments...
...before they pass us by...
Sunday, January 20, 2008
donnie darko said it best
Gretchen: Donnie Darko? What the hell kind of name is that? It's like some sort of superhero or something
Donnie: What makes you think I'm not?
My weekend was pretty random... nothing new there =p
I got to rd trip with some friends to visit with other friends.. awesome! Got to see one of my bests - that never sucks. I also got to play rock band.. two days straight. So I'm pretty much a pro now, haha. I got to eat some Italian Pie (rocks my face off) and hang out with a few people I haven't seen in a month or so. Pretty cool. Oh yes, my gps lost signal and I got lost. Of course. Typical.
Well, it's a lazy Sunday and I'm just kinda... taking some me time and thinking about my future. Change is the only element of life that is constant. As humans.. we strive on consistency but.. is there ever really 100% consistency to the daily life? Not in mine - I mix things up, add some spice to the daily episode of life.. to keep things interesting. That said, I'm exploring some options right now involving what I need/want out of life and I'm doing what I can to get that going. Wish me luck.. it's not as easy at it sounds... esp.. when I think.. well.. it's complicated...
Donnie Darko: i dont want to be alone...
Donnie: What makes you think I'm not?
My weekend was pretty random... nothing new there =p
I got to rd trip with some friends to visit with other friends.. awesome! Got to see one of my bests - that never sucks. I also got to play rock band.. two days straight. So I'm pretty much a pro now, haha. I got to eat some Italian Pie (rocks my face off) and hang out with a few people I haven't seen in a month or so. Pretty cool. Oh yes, my gps lost signal and I got lost. Of course. Typical.
Well, it's a lazy Sunday and I'm just kinda... taking some me time and thinking about my future. Change is the only element of life that is constant. As humans.. we strive on consistency but.. is there ever really 100% consistency to the daily life? Not in mine - I mix things up, add some spice to the daily episode of life.. to keep things interesting. That said, I'm exploring some options right now involving what I need/want out of life and I'm doing what I can to get that going. Wish me luck.. it's not as easy at it sounds... esp.. when I think.. well.. it's complicated...
Donnie Darko: i dont want to be alone...
Friday, January 18, 2008
Let it Snow!
It actually snowed last night!!!
How crazy/cool is that?!
Sadly, it didn't stick to the ground but despite the lack of white lawns..
it was still refreshing to see.
Something about chasing snowflakes and letting them melt on your tongue...
brings out a youthful innocence in everyone around.
I was able to drive into the winter mix and I was able to run around my yard like a 5yr old in a candy store with a fresh pocket full of change. I'm jealous of the areas of my state that actual snowfall but.. hey.. I'll take what I can get.
I love it.
Friday, January 11, 2008
pErcePtiOns
I thought I’d write you a few words that greatly impact perceptions... in an optimistic fashion. I’m all about discovering what is important to me these days and with such…. I’ve realized.
Life is short.
Break the rules.
Forgive quickly.
Kiss slowly.
Love truly.
Laugh uncontrollably.
Listen wisely.
‘And this above all us…. To thine own self be true’
aka:
Don’t worry about what he says/she says/they say – because it is Your life. How awesome is that? You were given a gift – you didn’t earn your right to be born so don’t take your life for granted. Anyway, you make your own choices. You were born alone and will, one day, die alone. Live your life to the fullest and surround yourself with happiness. What makes you happy – will not nec. make your neighbor happy so don’t live by comparisons. Follow your impulses, your heart, your dreams. Never give up on something you care about – you care for a reason. You are You and that is what makes You unique and special in this World. Never forget that, never.
ps.
Smile Often. =)
Life isn't complicated.. we just make it that way.
<3 - me
Life is short.
Break the rules.
Forgive quickly.
Kiss slowly.
Love truly.
Laugh uncontrollably.
Listen wisely.
‘And this above all us…. To thine own self be true’
aka:
Don’t worry about what he says/she says/they say – because it is Your life. How awesome is that? You were given a gift – you didn’t earn your right to be born so don’t take your life for granted. Anyway, you make your own choices. You were born alone and will, one day, die alone. Live your life to the fullest and surround yourself with happiness. What makes you happy – will not nec. make your neighbor happy so don’t live by comparisons. Follow your impulses, your heart, your dreams. Never give up on something you care about – you care for a reason. You are You and that is what makes You unique and special in this World. Never forget that, never.
ps.
Smile Often. =)
Life isn't complicated.. we just make it that way.
<3 - me
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
Evil Eye
Please turn up your volume and watch this hilarious kid.
This seriously brightened my day! hahaha
This seriously brightened my day! hahaha
Sunday, January 6, 2008
l-o-v-e
*ah ahh ahhhh chuuuuuuuuuuuuu*
Forgive me... *cough*.. for I have a slight cold.
Despite my 'out of it state' I did lock onto some great messages tonight. We talked about Love. A new guy spoke and he did a great job conveying his point.
We talked of "Love" and how it is nearly impossible to define. Seriously, have you ever tried? You simply can't say just one word to describe it. People tend to ramble on and on about the feeling and emotion bc we have a hard time being direct about this four letter word that means so much. However, the one thing that we can all agree on is that... Love is the Heart of Sacrifice. When you "Love" something - oftentimes you sacrifice your: time, money, pride... etc. Love costs you something.
I don't know what you believe in but it is my own thoughts that Love points you directly to God. With this love you have purpose for your life here. The sacrifices made for you - wow - amazing and out of, yes, Love.
This love - lives inside of us. It moves in us. It moves in me. It gives me hope that there is something bigger, greater than me. And there is.
Love is what inspires me, it fills my lungs and I hope that I breathe it out and live my life in such a way that I share this love with others.
There are different types of love... but one thing is understood.
It is real and it amazing.
It can make you do stupid things and act goofie.
It can make you lay down your life for another.
It can make you practice restraint.
It can teach you a lot about yourself and others.
It can leave you breathless.
It can make you cry, sing, dance, smile, sob.
This is a powerful emotion.
Don't let it fade and hide inside of you.
Love to a parent/friend/neighbor/girl or boy you like/stranger on the street.
Pass it on.
<3
Forgive me... *cough*.. for I have a slight cold.
Despite my 'out of it state' I did lock onto some great messages tonight. We talked about Love. A new guy spoke and he did a great job conveying his point.
We talked of "Love" and how it is nearly impossible to define. Seriously, have you ever tried? You simply can't say just one word to describe it. People tend to ramble on and on about the feeling and emotion bc we have a hard time being direct about this four letter word that means so much. However, the one thing that we can all agree on is that... Love is the Heart of Sacrifice. When you "Love" something - oftentimes you sacrifice your: time, money, pride... etc. Love costs you something.
I don't know what you believe in but it is my own thoughts that Love points you directly to God. With this love you have purpose for your life here. The sacrifices made for you - wow - amazing and out of, yes, Love.
This love - lives inside of us. It moves in us. It moves in me. It gives me hope that there is something bigger, greater than me. And there is.
Love is what inspires me, it fills my lungs and I hope that I breathe it out and live my life in such a way that I share this love with others.
There are different types of love... but one thing is understood.
It is real and it amazing.
It can make you do stupid things and act goofie.
It can make you lay down your life for another.
It can make you practice restraint.
It can teach you a lot about yourself and others.
It can leave you breathless.
It can make you cry, sing, dance, smile, sob.
This is a powerful emotion.
Don't let it fade and hide inside of you.
Love to a parent/friend/neighbor/girl or boy you like/stranger on the street.
Pass it on.
<3
Saturday, January 5, 2008
Ok Go
I was sitting at my computer sorting through videos that I marked as favorites and I came across this magic. I almost forgot about it, so funny.
We've all seen it but - Here it goes.. again.. (no pun intended!)
We've all seen it but - Here it goes.. again.. (no pun intended!)
Mr. Jones
Hey all,
It's been quite a long day but it's almost time to shrug off the daily blahs and focus on the comfort of a warm bed. I'm meeting up with a friend from high school in the am. She just got engaged.. cha-ching to yet another dress Ima have to buy! lol. She is great though and I couldn't be happier. She dated this guy for over 5 years and they will have a long engagement. They know what they're doing.
"All my friends are getting married... I'm just getting drunk"
-the saga continues.. -
Random aside: If someone would like to help me find a "Good" job - link me, that'd be rad. I'm almost thinking I should go work in Palm Bay, Florida bc I have a house there and... though I'd get minimal pay for an entry level job.. the view would be nothing short of refreshing. Alas, I love my friends/family too much to take up and go too far away. I like the state I live in, I really do. I'm ok being here. If I had a reason to leave I would.... unless I had a reason to stay. Does that make sense? Anyway, not living in a "cool" place.. is what makes vacations so great. You get to venture to the places you'd "love to live but never would" Better to keep that vision a dream to give yourself something to look forward to..
Speaking of different places - one on my bests/favoritest homeboy, moved tonight.. bah! =(
Not out of state or anything too dramatic.. just to another city. He moved with hopes of finding a better way than his current one. I admire him for taking the leap of faith to hopefully find something more suited to what he wants for his career. It's a hard thing to figure out. Lord knows I'm a bit lost in the job market right now. I've gotten a lot of job offers lately but I refuse to settle for something I know isn't right. It has been hard... but I honestly know in my heart that I'm being smart about this. I pray that hopefully soon - the right job will become available to me. Til then, I might be working at a new bar and grill. See, getting a "job" isn't hard, it's the career that I'm thirsty for.
Anyway, it's a bittersweet feeling when someone moves away. You can give someone all the love and support humanly possible and mean every single word you say... but in that moment of reality/silence, you can't help but be taken down by a wave of sadness. It's natural. Well, a short drive to another city is hardly the movie ending of a long , teary goodbye as you wave to fading car lights off in the distance. See, when you are close with someone, you make it work to see each other... nothing changes. If miles change your friendship/relationship with someone then you should prolly think about what that means. The marking and test of true friends, yes? You realize who is important to you in times of absence and lack of sight. And if this person is... for example... a best friend: then seeing them will be freaking cool and exciting. You communicate as normal, if not more so, and you carry on seeing each other when you can.
My point: I'm pretty sad that he won't be around for the daily hilarity of random hangouts and adventures... but now.. I look forward to the perusal good times when they can happen. I hope he finds what he is looking for... he is awesome and deserves happiness. He makes me smile and for that, I owe him one. 2007 was stellar. Truly awesome person... I'm going to miss muchly...
ps. don't take your friends for granted. your 'true' non sketchy, non agenda style friends - don't hesitate to love on them and remind them how much they mean to you.
<3, goodnight!
This will never get old to me =) :
It's been quite a long day but it's almost time to shrug off the daily blahs and focus on the comfort of a warm bed. I'm meeting up with a friend from high school in the am. She just got engaged.. cha-ching to yet another dress Ima have to buy! lol. She is great though and I couldn't be happier. She dated this guy for over 5 years and they will have a long engagement. They know what they're doing.
"All my friends are getting married... I'm just getting drunk"
-the saga continues.. -
Random aside: If someone would like to help me find a "Good" job - link me, that'd be rad. I'm almost thinking I should go work in Palm Bay, Florida bc I have a house there and... though I'd get minimal pay for an entry level job.. the view would be nothing short of refreshing. Alas, I love my friends/family too much to take up and go too far away. I like the state I live in, I really do. I'm ok being here. If I had a reason to leave I would.... unless I had a reason to stay. Does that make sense? Anyway, not living in a "cool" place.. is what makes vacations so great. You get to venture to the places you'd "love to live but never would" Better to keep that vision a dream to give yourself something to look forward to..
Speaking of different places - one on my bests/favoritest homeboy, moved tonight.. bah! =(
Not out of state or anything too dramatic.. just to another city. He moved with hopes of finding a better way than his current one. I admire him for taking the leap of faith to hopefully find something more suited to what he wants for his career. It's a hard thing to figure out. Lord knows I'm a bit lost in the job market right now. I've gotten a lot of job offers lately but I refuse to settle for something I know isn't right. It has been hard... but I honestly know in my heart that I'm being smart about this. I pray that hopefully soon - the right job will become available to me. Til then, I might be working at a new bar and grill. See, getting a "job" isn't hard, it's the career that I'm thirsty for.
Anyway, it's a bittersweet feeling when someone moves away. You can give someone all the love and support humanly possible and mean every single word you say... but in that moment of reality/silence, you can't help but be taken down by a wave of sadness. It's natural. Well, a short drive to another city is hardly the movie ending of a long , teary goodbye as you wave to fading car lights off in the distance. See, when you are close with someone, you make it work to see each other... nothing changes. If miles change your friendship/relationship with someone then you should prolly think about what that means. The marking and test of true friends, yes? You realize who is important to you in times of absence and lack of sight. And if this person is... for example... a best friend: then seeing them will be freaking cool and exciting. You communicate as normal, if not more so, and you carry on seeing each other when you can.
My point: I'm pretty sad that he won't be around for the daily hilarity of random hangouts and adventures... but now.. I look forward to the perusal good times when they can happen. I hope he finds what he is looking for... he is awesome and deserves happiness. He makes me smile and for that, I owe him one. 2007 was stellar. Truly awesome person... I'm going to miss muchly...
ps. don't take your friends for granted. your 'true' non sketchy, non agenda style friends - don't hesitate to love on them and remind them how much they mean to you.
<3, goodnight!
This will never get old to me =) :
Friday, January 4, 2008
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
+of+DSCF4363.JPG){kind=small}